Surely he took up our infirmities and carried our sorrows, yet we considered him stricken by God, smitten by him, and afflicted. But he was pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was upon him, and by his wounds we are healed. Isaiah 53: 4-5The pangs of the heart that leave you feeling lost can lead you to me. Precious child, let me take you in my hands and comfort you. There I will sculpt away the jagged edges...
If you have done something because of me, or because you want me to be full to the brim in your life, you will drink the cup of sorrow at times. Things that could of been but are not because I had better in store for you. You have been saved a lifetime of pain. So do not dwell on the past and all that lays there-dwell on me here and now. But if you choose to go there (to the past) know that I am there too-and I have redeemed all. No dead leaves there. They have decomposed, providing nutrients to the soil which nourishes you now at this very moment.
I know sometimes you have to look back to grieve-to see the dying of the leaves, of their falling and scattering, and slowly rotting away. Sometimes I even take you there. But don't dwell there. See the new life, the new fruit which hangs on your branches. The roots that have grown deep in the prevailing winds.
I am sorry that you feel sad.
